Wednesday, April 3, 2013

5 Years

Five years ago today I was given a gift like no other.  Along with the sweetest little 8lb baby boy I'd ever seen, I was entrusted with the gift of motherhood.  And man has it taken me for a ride in five short years!?!  Through the highest of joys and the lowest of tragedies it is the most noble job I have had or ever will.  There are days I fail miserably and days I go to sleep with a smile glued to my face.  There are moments each day I beg God for mercy & moments I thank Him for goodness.  It's taught me more than I could fathom and I've got a LONG way to go and lots to learn...

This sweet little stubborn son of mine turning five today came into this world butting heads with me one second and making me cry for joy the next and he hasn't stopped yet.  He refused to enter the world the way we wanted and he's had 'bigger and better' ideas ever since.  It doesn't seem possible that he's FIVE and starting kindergarten this year.  I feel like I just stayed up pacing the floors all night with him in my arms.
Ryder has literally SHOVED me through this past year.  I honestly don't know if I'd be standing where I am today if it weren't for him carrying me along.  The love he had for his brother from the moment he knew he existed was contagious.  And his visions & dreams of him now are astounding.  His hope, belief, & trust through this all continue to challenge my faith daily.  And his sweet smile helps me face each new day... and choose thankfulness.

So today as I clean his MANY messes, enter into his passionate heated debates (about something uber important I'm sure), feed his always hungry belly, listen to his constant humming and chatter I will remember how good God is.  I will remember how creative He is.  Because if this little 5 year old boy is just one tiny glimmer of how creative my creator is I'm still in for a journey.

And this year, celebrating this 5th year is just a little bit sweeter.  We've been given a glimpse of how fleeting life is and how much it means to celebrate it.  And I will joyfully wake him up and take him to get donuts, take cupcakes to his class at school, let him play a little extra on the playground with his sister, surprise him with a dinner trip to Chuck E Cheese (with that wretched mouse & bad pizza!), let him stay up a little late, and put together the biggest & baddest Lego party I can.

I will help him with his BIG plans, whether about Legos or how he's gonna change the world...